So...to be honest...this is a re-post.
I just feel like I finally got it right.
Reagan started Kindergarten on Monday.
and to be honest. I tried to write about it.
but, I couldn't.
I mean I did.
Write about it...but every time I wrote something it just didn't come out right.
I couldn't seem to find the words to express what I was feeling.
Maybe because I was feeling so much.
Monday...This happened...
and my heart broke into a million pieces...
Reagan has been waiting for this day forever.
Last year at the bus stop she talked with all the other kids and parents about how she would be getting on the bus "next" year. So as we approached the bus stop...
They cheered for her. They literally clapped and woo hoo'd for her.
and she loved it.
My baby...she ran to the bus stop.
She was excited about all of it...
The new outfit...
The new back pack...
The friends and family that came to see her off on her new adventure..
She was excited about ALL of it...
me on the other hand.
Not so much.
Here's the thing.
Reagan, she's not just MY baby. She is THE baby.
Not to mention, Reagan has been with me FOREVER.
I worked at the center she went to when she was an infant and a toddler...
I was her preschool teacher...
it's kind of been us...
against the world...
I was there when she learned her colors...
I was there when she learned her shapes...
I taught her how to write her name...
and now...
someone else is going to do it...
and I am going to miss it...
and I hate it.
She is my baby...my last baby..
This is the last time I will be putting one of my babies on the bus for kindergarten for the first time...
and as crazy as it seems... it is ending for me.
As I looked at my girl...at the bus stop...with all the other "big" kids...
I knew she was ready...and I had to let her go.
I knew I had done the best I could to give her the tools she is going to need to go out there...
and kick some butt...
in the real world...
without her Mommy.
but that doesn't mean I won't be there...
To hold her hand whenever she needs it...
To help her up in case she falls..
To remind her that she is one of the most incredible people I have ever met...
and that she CAN do anything...
ANYTHING she puts her mind to...
And most importantly that while she is away from me...
making choices
and just being "big"...
That I am always with her...
cheering her on.
Needless to say ... As the bus pulled away.
I cried. A lot.
And oh boy was I excited when the afternoon came and it was time for that big yellow bus to drop off my baby to me.
She had a great day.
She loved Art.
She LOVED recess.
She wants to try hot lunch.
She thinks her teachers are really nice.
She feels shy around her new friends.
She is remembered to remind me to wear sneakers for gym day.
She loved the bus.
and the very very best part.
She missed her Mom...almost as much as her Mom missed her....
4 comments:
Aw!!! I could cry just reading your post and I know just how you feel! I cannot imagine sending my youngest 2 off next year - all day - every day! Yikes! (((((HUGS))))) So glad she had a great day and you survived!
I so know how you feel. She's such a beautiful little girl and it's so wonderful to read about her joy of school!
What a wonderful, heart-felt description of your baby's first day off to school! I was a high school teacher when my children were in school, so the first day was a rush operation for all of us. My school was 3 blocks away so I had to get permission to be a little late that first day.
http://withinmyfocus.blogspot.com/2010/09/amen-sunday-snapshot.html
So sweet!! It's so hard to let them grow up, isn't it?!?
You definitely did this post justice... what a great Snapshot!
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